By Francis Ewherido
WhatsApp is one of the comparatively new means of mass communication I use a lot. The reasons are multiple. One, it is “free.” Once I make my internet subscription, I am good to go. Happily, the internet subscription allows me to have access to both old and new means of mass communication and much more at no extra cost. Anyway, the internet is now basic to modern day living: business, family, socialisation, education, acquisition of knowledge, etc.
Another beauty of WhatsApp is the way it helps to recreate family life of old, albeit virtually. In the olden days, families got under the moonlight to bond, tell stories and pass on knowledge to the younger generation. With modernisation, television replaced tales by moonlight. Families gathered together in the evening to watch television. Later, television stations started broadcasting 24/7. This had an impact on the 5pm to 10pm and sometimes midnight gatherings in front of television by families. These days that culture is fast changing if not dying. The Internet and the new media of mass communication have provided many more options.
I do not know how many families still gather to watch television. In my household, the only time we all gather in front of TV or laptop is to follow a church programme/prayer or do night prayer. My television set is becoming a relic. I am not much of a TV person anymore. The only time I watch TV is football and my last son is the only one who watches with me. I follow the news online. At one point, my children had a meeting and came to me to stop “wasting” money on Pay TV. Instead, they said I should just give them 24/7 internet. I obeyed.
But one thing WhatsApp has done for many families is a family group where family members bond, interact, catch up with one another, share photos, old and new; resolve family disputes, plan and execute events, the benefits are endless. WhatsApp has an advantage over physical interaction because it is virtual. That way, it accommodates all family members because distance is no barrier. Many families used to do zoom meetings but the glitches are annoying. Unless it is very important, WhatsApp is just it. It does not suffer the glitches zoom meetings are prone to.
WhatsApp family groups also provide parents a good platform to train and mentor their children. In those days parents relied mainly on their personal knowledge to raise and mentor their children. These days, there is an avalanche of materials online. Parents simply post and discuss these materials on family WhatsApp groups to guide, mentor and groom their children. It is potent though different from the wise sayings and proverbs that were used to raise people of my generation. Then parents spoke with signs, eyes and facial expressions and we understood. Many in this generation simply want you to spill it out. They are blind to sign language. It is all right. The bottom line is to raise responsible children who will make you proud, achieve great things and add value to humanity.
Besides family WhatsApp groups, companies, alumni associations, churches and many other bodies have found WhatsApp very useful. You can run your small business and communicate with staff mainly with the company WhatsApp group. Internal memos are not used, unless you really want to make it official. You can also relate with clients mainly with WhatsApp, although I still prefer to use official emails in many instances when it really needs to be official.
Like all good things, WhatsApp does have its downsides. Let me just highlight a few starting with the family. We are in a society where older people are accorded a lot of respect. It is a great part of our culture and I just love it. But these older people should realise that younger people are not morons. They also deserve some respect and dignity. Some elders carry their overbearing attitude to the family WhatsApp group space. There is a family head who told his younger sibling who is in his 60s during a family meeting that, “W’omotete. Die worienre? (You are a small boy. What do you know?)” How can a grandfather in his 60s be called a small boy? How can you ask someone who rose to the pinnacle of his career, “what do you know?” I don’t get it. Is age the only way to acquire knowledge and experience?
Each time, I get into a hot argument with my 91-year-old mother and she wants to bring the argument to a close, she would simply say, “me vwiewe (I gave birth to you).” The implication is to accept what I said and stop arguing. The last time she said it, I really got upset and asked her if she is as educated and well-travelled as I am. She used to tell us when we were young that good education drives away ignorance and foolishness. Also, the person who has travelled knows more than the one who has not, so I got her there. I don’t know why I still argue with her. All my brothers have told me to let her be. When I try to, she calls me and says she has not heard from me for a while and she is missing my wahala!
Many older people in the family carry this repository-of-knowledge mentality to WhatsApp family groups. Age should be respected, but democracy, not autocracy, should be practiced in WhatsApp groups. Give everybody his/her due. Let me also chip in that some young people overstep their boundaries in WhatsApp groups. They need to be careful because in some big WhatsApp groups, many people do not know one another personally. You can step on the toes of a potential destiny helper, a game changer, without knowing.
Other WhatsApp groups also have issues. One of the major problems is deviating from the original reason why the group was set up. We have a WhatsApp group where I live. It’s basically meant to discuss issues concerning the association and the area. Currently, we have many pressing issues, but nobody talks about them. Then every morning some people post religious stuff on the platform. Personally, I am not impressed. I have groups and individuals who send me religious stuff daily. I am only interested in what’s going on around my neighbourhood as far as the group is concerned.
During the last election, many WhatsApp groups became war zones across party and ethnic lines. A very intellectual group I belong to also got sucked into 2023 election brouhaha. They abandoned the very educative posts I enjoyed reading so much. Even church and many other groups were not left out. They created avoidable animosity among members of the group. I just watched in bemusement. I have been involved in elections since 2003. Elections are won in the field and in the “field” not WhatsApp groups. I hope they learn in 2027 and direct their energies in the right direction.
Unfortunately, I also got involved in a few virtual altercations. I quickly came to my senses and asked myself, “what is all this madness for?” I remembered my grandma’s nickname (odova) and adopted it. If you call her “esevweremare” (old people’s fashion), she would respond, “obijiwoni, wo kwepharokufia” (If you find it unpleasant or unattractive, look the other way). These days, I simply ignore WhatsApp posts I find unpleasant or unattractive. If I have contrary views, I can always avail myself of other mass media platforms to express my views. There’s no need for avoidable quarrels and enmity.
Finally, people should refrain from cyberbullying in WhatsApp groups. The new media and the old media are free market places of ideas where people express their freedom within boundaries without let or hinderance. Do not intimidate people with your age, intelligence, money, knowledge, position, etc. You are there to elevate, inform, educate and titillate not belittle people.
